Punching bag

I guess I'm that punching bag for everyone... even the closest and dearest of friends...


Must I be accused...?
For not loving, for not caring, for not being there, for everything I've done with love and care...
You said I don't love or care... but do you know what is my feeling in my heart...?
You know that you going away hurts me, yet you must mention it...
You know that saying that I don't care, but yet I still must be said of it...
Its not about I don't, its about the perspective you look from...
After all... I'm a punching bag... and I'll be staying that way... cause I know it'll hurt me more when I react...
Sorry for reacting...
I'll never react to things you said again... I'll just be there... listening... nodding... watching... and I'll just say yes or no... or being all quiet.

At the final words...

Dear ...,
You know who you are... I'm sorry. Sorry that... I'm that bad. I thought I was ok... at least acceptable... but it seems... I'm just the worst of all guys you'll ever have to meet.
Despite everything, one thing for sure that I do know... is that I really do love you regardless of what you think... the fact is- I do.
I don't know what I'm not open enough... cause despite of whatever openness you tell me... I still accepted you, because I see a hope. As I hope you already know... I wouldn't be with someone unless I want to marry that person. I do not and have never force you to convert but I'm just so sorry that sometimes that I can be so passionate.
I'm passionate because I see what Christ can bring into one's life. But I do respect you and your religion. Even when I pray, I don't ask you to be converted, I pray that you'll accept it by your own in time and not because of me. I don't want it... cause you'll never be happy.
I'm very sorry of everything... of every trouble that I've caused you.
Sorry to waste those sacrifice of yours where you are forced to lie to your parents.
Waiting for me by delaying your graduation.
Wasting your time when we go out all the time.
All the emotional thoughts and problems.
I appreciate them and I truly thank you and apologize for so much of your sacrifice.
I know all I gave you is misery and more misery.
I'm sorry for everything.
I'll treasure all that you have given me as memories... forever and ever.
I thank God I've met you and got to share so many memories together but I just hope I could have left you a better experience with me.
Anyways, I'm going now... take care and be happy always. God bless.

Smile always, laugh forever

Encouragement comes from all source. Be it, a source that hurts you, or really encourages you.

One thing I learn, is we choose the feelings we want, whether we want to respond to it happily and positively, or bitterly and sadly, it is entirely up to us.

Someone can scold the hell out of you, but we can always choose how we want to respond to that of being scolded. You can respond being sad and remorse of your actions, or you can just smile and tell yourself about the opportunity to improve yourself :)

You

You came into my life on the 28 of November 2010. You're a great and wonderful blessing in my life. Even though you're not a Christian, I still believe God placed you in my life for a reason. You're a wonderful girl, a great companion, a awesome partner... The best there is :)

You're cute, beautiful, optimistic, supportive, loving, caring, a good listener; an awesome girl.

All the 9 months (and more to come hopefully) with you, I'm happy, very happy being with you.

Although... There are times where I feel very sorry for hurting you, for being bad, for not being there, for mistreating you... and I could never be sorrier.

However, never once have I stopped loving you.

There are times, I feel I don't deserve you but yet you're here with me.

I really do appreciate and love you

Why...?

Sometimes... I just wonder why... why doesn't things go the way I ask for... I wonder if the Lord my God is trying to show me his awesomeness through another way? or what...

Sometimes I do see his awesomeness... sometimes yet I wonder...

Its been dusty

It seems I've stopped blogging so long that I don't even know how does blogger works now...
Causes I stopped? Lazy... tired... no inspiration :)

Updates

Its been long, too long since I blogged...
Anyways here some short updates
Finals is over
Semester break is here
College is getting fun
I'm getting colder by the moment
Lots of outings these few days

So thats all basically xD