Updates

Its been long, too long since I blogged...
Anyways here some short updates
Finals is over
Semester break is here
College is getting fun
I'm getting colder by the moment
Lots of outings these few days

So thats all basically xD

Where Am I heading?

Its almost like 3 months since I started college...
Seriously its stressful by the periods.

1 moment full of works, next moment, rather relaxing...
College, what can I say?
I like it in certain ways, especially meeting new people.
Learning new things, getting to crap and lamerise people lol.

Although, sometimes I'm rather confused whether I'm heading down the right path, I need guide, I need help, I need a revelation.

The sound of silent still water droplets

The sound of peace, the voice of relieve and the joy of quietness.
The Lord is ever faithful to one who believes in him.
Its some times hard to believe I have a great God looking down from above, watching over me.
Providing for me needs is what he does best =)
From the most minor to major needs, he provides all. From a word of encouragement to the wonder of miracle beyond comprehension, all to show his love that is never changing, which is same, yesterday, today and tomorrow.
Once again God has proven that He has never forsaken me.

Stricken with loneliness for weeks but covered with a mask of joy and smile.
I never really told Him, but indeed He knows my heart best.
Its was just by a simple step of faith out for a altar call was changed entirely by the word spoken through another brother, through that prayer told me that God listens and He cares so much that He knows my heart full well.
All I can say is
Thank You Jesus for being there for me every moment =)

Somethings linger

There are somethings that stays there if we keep "feeding" it...
I guess it won't go off anytime sooner unless a miracle happens.
But I'm in doubt, not doubting whether miracle would happen or not but rather in doubt and confusion about am I really ok? Or the problems lies not only in me?
Though I'm not in the position to judge because all in all, I'm just a mere human.
So, all I can do is pray, where the problem lies in, that God will bring out a solution.
Sometimes the pain is unbearable, but its life, I'm just going to persevere through, I want to believe, but I pray that God would help me in my unbelieve.

Just changing title

Well, I've changed my blog address and name =) Hope everyone will update their blog links and get used to it.

Of calm waters and rapids, with a smile too =)

College has started for almost 4 weeks now. Most of the time, things seems ok.
I made friends, works are ok for now, rising busyness is still ok for me and the lecturers are rather friendly.
Despite the "calm waters" there are too some "rapids".
To mention a few would  be like, certain times of boringness, uncertainty, certain minor "pains", slowness in learning(especially Calculus), not having many "better known" friends yet(only a few, many know them by name but hardly talk to them) and sometimes the feeling of being ignored, left out and not noticed. Sometimes, I'm just feeling weak and frustrated thinking "how I'm going to go through everything?".

I guess all these are just the well basics of the beginning of college life...
Sometimes I just feel tired going through all these.
But I guess thats only human when we feel like that, when we're adapting, although some adapt better then others.

Another thing would be decision making, lots of decisions to go through, lots of decision to analyse...
Some of those "basic" decisions are not so basic anymore when you really go into deep thinking and analyzing about them...

Despite all, there are many things to that I want to thank God for.
Especially when I drive, thank God for his countless mercy and grace upon me not to forget his protection for the number of "close calls" I had.
I don't dare to imagine where would I be if he wasn't there to look after me.
Besides all these "close calls" do their part in making me a better and more experience driver =)
The "calm waters" above too are worth thanking God for.

While "rapids" are just there to better shape me...
Maybe through all these, many more changes will I see in my life.
At the end I guess these "rapids" are there just to make a man of me? lol
A way to prepare me for the even tougher challenges ahead =)

That concludes my activity for today.
God bless =)

Complextion made mobile

Alright updates, updates.
First of all, college has entered week 2, and I'm still deciding...
Oh, I really pray for an answer...
Arts, I take Finite maths, Science I'll have to take Calculus...
I'm wondering if I could cope with Calculus... and pursuit engineering...
If not, should I go for Arts and pursuit a simpler job? Business? Mass com?
Decisions, decisions are giving me a hard time...

Then, I finally got my laptop last week, and it just makes things simpler and more mobile.
Specification?
Acer Aspire 5745G
Intel i7-720QM
Nvidia GT330M GPU of 1GB memory
4GB ram
500GB HDD
15.6" 16:9 HD LCD
Windows 7 Home Premium 64-bit operating system

Well, basically these are the specs =)
Anyways these are the updates for now
God bless and have a great week
-Darrell

I don't see what you see

My current blog theme and colorization needs some comments, cause I can see what I can see...
But I can't see what you guys can see lol
To me everything is clear and nice but I don't know about readers, so if anything is like too glaring or whatever, do leave comments =)

Adapt, learn and survive

Alright, its day 2 of my college. College is a totally brand new experience.
Still quite somethings to settle, before its called basically "settled"
Hmm like well you know, fees, peoples.
And gotta get used to the time and environment.
Of all, clubs/societies, not sure what to join, so many clubs, so little time, cause I heard that most club's meetings are held on Fridays.
Now, is between Christian Fellowship, HMC lead's "sub club" C2AGE or adventure club...
Hope that time for meeting does not clash then can join all =D

Compared to the first day, at least I'm getting used to it, spoke, got to know someone which is also in foundation in science =)
I not really the socializing kind of person, I'm shy, quiet... well that is until I get to know the people around me...
Example: Church's Cell Group ^^
An example of my adaptation and learning.

Today was my first mistake --"
Saw wrong time went in class like 45 minutes late...
Thank God it was not a subject class...

Anyways they have many computers, just that is old like --"
Of the many rooms, I've went into 2 before, 1 is worst then the other...
Why?
Cause 1 room all using roller ball mouse --"
But the other still ok la... optical mouse...
Specification of the PC are:
-Windows XP SP2
-Pentium 4
-512mb ram o.o"
But then its a good thing the computer is rather open, can modified =)
Used 1 PC today and I somewhat customized it with Google chrome XD
So overall cannot call rock, stone or wooden PC
Its somewhere after wooden lol
Basically acceptable for internet surfing but seriously not multitasking --

But then I still rather get a laptop, my laptop faster come, faster, I want to Razerize it XD

Anyways there are still a lot of things to handle.
Gotta adapt to the new environment and timing.
Gotta learn to make friends.
And I'll survive =D

But, in all, I'm not going to worry because all will turn out well when God is with me =)
Thats the update for today
God bless

From the one and only Darrell

Blog overhauled

How the new template and everything?

Give comments =)

The colour theme is between yellow, green and orange chosen to sorta fit the background :D

Credits go to my cousin, Bing Han for introducing the tool =)

It just seems missing

Sometimes its just makes me speechless, seeing life goes on yet...I see no smile and I see no laughter and it just makes me feel something is missing...

Its just like in a hot day where I just want it to rain.

Then I see the clouds come and it gives me a sight of relieve.

But its what comes next then really makes the big difference...

Its either rain or it just there with winds and breeze.

When it rains its just like laughter that spark off even more laughter, like before...

It does not matter if it rained somewhere else, for what matters is to whom the rain falls on...

But when the clouds are just there with wind and breeze, its just like a very cold and dull presence, which gives me the relieve from the hot weather but does not at all produce a smile.

All I just want to say is rain for I want to see that smile again =)

Its just something I want to post...

I doubt anyone understands what I'm trying to say, unless you have tune in to the same "frequency"

From the vaulted doors within the depths of my heart

Significance

College is starting next week, so next Monday will mark the end of my longest "holiday" ever lol.

Thinking about college there lies only 1 problem, Foundation is Science/Arts?

Science, yea I love science, I love Physics, maths and I want to go for Aerospace Engineering...

But... I can't seem to think of any job opportunity relating with Aerospace engineering in Malaysia... and I don't plan to work overseas...

For Arts on the other hand which many recommend but I'm not very sure what I'm interested at. There might be few that I think I would be interested at... Its what I think like, mass com or business... But that what I think I would like if I go for Arts...

So, in both path to say, I'm still not sure...

My dream is to be a Astronautic engineer that instead of making in planes, jet or flying objects, makes something that is for exploration beyond earth, ya know like spaceships, not those old rusted and outdated space shutter and rockets, but something that is new, beyond the box that would propel human civilization into the next era lol which is rather a impossible dream and rather crazy one too that seems to come out of the science fiction, but its really something I want to try to do...

Even I myself think what I want to do is crazy, what more of others... lol

For others, Nanotechnology enginnering... or even a journalist, Stal *ahem* ker? lol

Or if not, I'll just follow the foot steps of my parents of being in the insurance sector...

But then in all, I just seem to be very uncertain about my future...

Been praying too... answers have not come thus far... I believe it would come but at the appropriate time =)

Alright, this would be my update today =)

Do leave comments at the cbox if anyone is ever interested to give your thoughts or idea =)

and God bless

Delivered straight from the heart of Darrell ^^

The rare action

Whats rare? I hardly read xD

So I'm reading thanks to a book a got for my birthday ^^

Now something to do to fill in the free times

The book title is called: Butterfly in Brazil

Its a Christian book about how our life can make a world of difference.

Book is written by Glenn Packiam, one of the worship leaders from Desperation band/New Life Church.

Whats interesting about Glenn is he grew up in Malaysia ^^

This will last for a week or so lol

Anyways, this is a short update on my activity.

God bless.

From Darrell with Love :p

18th

Its Birthday +2.

Its hard to believe I'm 18 already, lived for 18 years lol

Well, pray that this year would be a great year with new experience ^^

Well, short update today.

From Darrell with love XD

Just 1

Hmm, its been weeks since I last updated, due to laziness and I wasn't inspired that much.

So after results, I've been slacking at home besides going out for movies with friends, taking driving lessons and nothing more if I recalled everything.

Just to keep the blog rather "alive" heres a "defibrillator" charge :D

Something that just came into my mind.

Everyday there are people around us facing problems, facing crisis, facing stress, going into "emoness" and so on and so forth.

I think sometimes giving just 1 simple simple encouragement can really brighten up a person's day =)

God bless and keep smiling

From Darrell with love :p

Just another part of life :)

Its been almost 4 months+ of waiting and finally the SPM results have been released.

However its sad to say, overall I was quite bad at it... but then it exceeded my expectations to see all subjects passed.

Its like a light in the burning fire :)

So, I'm here in all giving thanks to God.

The results are as follow:

BM- C+

BI - A+

PM- C+

SEJ- C+

MM- C+

AM - D

Physics- C+

Chemistry- D

Biology- C

EST- A-

BK- C

I'm blogging here about my results not because I'm proud of it, not because I like it, but its because its written rejoice and give thanks to God in all situations and here I am rejoicing that I passed every subject :D

This is my result today, and in times to come, I know I will do much better.

This is not only to give thanks to God, but also act as a reminder for me to learn from my mistakes.

I believe God has his purpose and he has his ways =)

I know everyone else around me did much better, really better then mine, if compared, where am I to even compare? But whats pass is pass, I look at the pass to learn but I do not live in the pass.

I fell, but I'm not defeated...

I was hurt, but I'm not scarred.

Life goes on no matter what, failures are just 1 part of life.

Failures are great learning experience for us.

Failures shapes a better person.

I'll do better, much better :)

Well, my 200th blog post marks the end of 1 part of life but it shall also mark the beginning of a walk into another part of life.

Let this new part of life be blessed by God, may God continue to guide me and lead me too :)

From Darrell with love xD

Ever Wondering

Ever wondered what are your talents?

I guess everyone has their moments of thoughts...

And till date, I still wondering, still seeking, still searching, still finding for my talent(s).

What am I good at I just wonder? Am I at all good at anything?

I don't know, I just can't seem to find out what I'm good at...

Gaming? Nah, there are still many better out there...

Singing? Don't think so... although I like singing alone where no one else is around o.o

Instrument? My guitar is like -- other then that I haven't have to opportunity to try it out...

Well, what am looking for? What do I expect to see myself to be?

I don't even know.

Sometimes I feel that everything I do ain't just good enough,

Sometimes I feel that I can't match up to others...

I worry about my future, about will I survive when I go to work in future? Can I be successful?

All these question and worried constantly flood me. I believe many think the same?

Well, sometimes I just think I just need to go by faith and wait a little longer...

Sometimes I think its just faith that drives my life.

Well God always works in miracle, I'll just wait and see :)

You are

Who are the one the stand by us

-In times of trails?

-In times of troubles?

-In times of grief?

-In times of pain?

-In times of failure?

-In times of our fall?

-In times of joy

-In times of success

-In times of happiness

-In times of victory?

Besides God and our family, true friends are the one!

Thank you for those that have stand by me through time.

The unknown

Am I ready to step into the unknown of the unknowns?

I do hope I'm, with faith that guides me and he who leads me...

Past

My past was not such a pleasant one.

I was not who I am, I was not living the life God want me to.

I know my past.

But the past is past, I can't change it but I don't want to live in it again.

Let the past be the past, let what was left behind be left there.

I don't want to fall into my past again, I had enough, I want to move on.

Step back I shall not, into the valley of darkness.

How far and hard this road will go but I will go by the faith that guides me,

For I'm just dust of the ground.

As dawn marks a beginning, so does dusk marks the end.

Who makes the dawn, who makes the dusk?

For He who makes them, makes me.

And for He who makes me, marks my timeline.

So who can I trust more then the person who makes me and determines my timeline?

No one else but God alone.

A role for each face

We meet lots of people in our life, some we make them our friends, some we make them known to ourselves, some we just make them a face in our mind.

You know it just makes me think, whats the purpose of meeting people everyday.

This thought just came into me, each one of them plays a role, a reason, a purpose.

Even though its just 1 look and just once, that moment might just play a role in God's purpose.

Whether in our life, our theirs, it just play a purpose whether small or big, all will cause an impact.

Some might just cause a change, some will forge a friendship, some driving us to move on, and even some people that will be with us for life.

So, every friend there is, every friend you have, are there for a purpose.

Friends are one part of life, we cannot live without friends.

Even God says he is our friend, our best friend.

Friendship therefore is beautiful.

True friendship with trust is hard to earn, but easy to lose.

Whats worth more then gold, friendship is.

Whats the meaning of life without friendship?

To all my friends:

I love you!

And God bless our friendship to last forever and ever till the end of days :)

Progress

Inspiration just comes like that I guess...

Progress, when we think about it, we think about success, accomplishment, great achievements and so on...

Well, sometimes, I just think about everything that happens in life, what do we call them?

For me I think its all under 1 same word, progress.

When we come to think about it, you will find its true.

Because in everything there is progress.

In life we are constantly progressing, and in no way we are going backwards.

We progress even in mistakes, in failures, in troubles...

How? By learning, by experiencing, by overcoming it.

It all leads to progression.

The only way that will cause us not to progress is not doing anything and giving up.

Therefore never give up, keep life going, keep things going, keep that heart beating and you are constantly moving forward.

God made everything happen for progress, but you are the one that chooses to progress or to

to surrender.

Words

Alright, first of all before I blog anything, I'm just gonna thank God for guiding me in passing my undang test!

Not just a pass, but a pass with miracle marks- 49/50

First of all, many know that I have partial colour blindness.

I thank God that he helped me to find a solution to pass the colour blind test.

A simple solution- A red and blue 3D spectacle.

Secondly, I thank him for the extra time there before the test which gave me time to do extra revision.

That gave me just all the advantage to get the marks mentioned above.

Well, I did not expect a 49 lol.

At first, I looked at the screen without looking properly and thought I only got 42, the passing park.

Well, I thanked God I passed.

After the score was printed, I realize I looked at the wrong mark, it was 49 :)

I can't believe it, really thank God.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well, the main topic I wanna blog tonight is stated as the title.

Life, we only go through it once, we only have 1 chance and its only a short time, even shorter for some.

"What can we do in life?" Many will ask.

Many will say "Live it like you want, as long you're happy"

Some say "Live it to the max"

Others say "Live it meaningfully"

Rarely said "Live it to the max for God's kingdom that you may glorify his name by impacting the lives of others with meaning"

Living a life for God?

I sometimes think, it starts with 1 simple choice each of us decide each day- the choice of "word"

Words, can be said to be one of the most powerful thing.

Why?

The Word of God, the Bible, says it all.

Apart from that, we can see how words affect the world.

A simple choice of word can cause conflict;

A simple choice of word can spark a war;

A simple choice of word can determine prices;

A simple choice of word drives many things.

For us? Its no least powerful too.

A simple choice of word can encourage one;

A simple choice of word can help one to move on;

A simple choice of word can make a smile;

but

A simple choice of word can also destroy dreams;

A simple choice of word can destroy life;

A simple choice of word can end one's life;

and

A simple choice of word could change one's life forever.

How do we live for God?

By choosing the right words in our daily life, that would make an impact in others.

So, what are your choice of words?

Does it encourage one? or Does it discourage one?

Does it make a smile? or Does it cause tears to fall?

Does it start a life? or Does it end one's life?

Many are the choices of life, and our daily words are just one of them.

Words are simple choices, but can really make a big difference.

Thats all for today.

God bless.

Life as it is

Well, its been some time since I last blogged.

After SPM life is starting to be a little boring.

Its been 2 days since I came back from Hong Kong, and since then I've been "disintegrating" at home...

How I missed the routines of school... sometimes.

Raindrops

Dust setting

Well just some random pictures taken from the plane with the phone camera...

I'm feel rather lost on my heading of life right now, where am I heading I just wonder...

Am I heading the right way? What is God planning for me ahead?

Sometimes its just hard to keep our mind clear of these questions.

But then through all these, I believe its where faith kicks in.

Faith not in ourselves, but faith in God, faith in His plans.

We are all made with flaws, non is flawless.

Sometimes, with so many flaws, I just think I'm useless in a sense.

I faced failures in many parts in life.

Looking back I just wonder how did I coup with it...

I guess it was God that comforts me all the time.

Sometimes I'm thankful that I'm rather forgetful and blurry because I can get over things easier I guess :)

Well, I guess every flaws just serves a purpose in our life?

I sometimes think maybe the flaws serves as a boundary.

Maybe the flaws serves as a purpose to prevent certain temptations? Well, I don't know, only God knows.

In this verse Psalm 139 mentioned:

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

Psalm 139:14

This verse to me meant a lot.

God made us with his infinite wisdom, and so if with his infinite wisdom there shouldn't be any flaws in us right? But then we are full of flaws, why? Because He has a purpose for the flaws that came with us, won't you agree? So in a sense he make us perfect for his plans :)

He can make us perfect if he wants to, but then there would not be much purpose in our lives wouldn't it?

Just imagine a world where everyone is perfect, imagine that everyone is free of troubles cause we are perfectly made, how would we live our everyday life?

I can only imagine a world of humanoids. Everyone through the same routine, same thoughts.

Sometimes I think the ability to make freewill decisions are one of the main source of our flaws.

Sin is a flaw, no? Cause we make decisions, we are subjected to sinning.

Well, its my personal opinion based on experience and understanding.

Temptation are one of the main source that causes us to sin, but its not the ultimate source, the ultimate source is our freewill decision.

We are the ones that ultimately make the decision whether to "bow" to temptation.

God knows this, so this verse was promised:

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

1 Corinthians 10:13

So in everything where there is a way in, there is always a way out.

The decision is ours ultimately.

God can help us, but we decide whether to accept his help.

Well, I guess thats all I'm gonna blog today.

God bless.

What If?

Recently, thoughts have been flooding my mind...

These 2 words "what if" often appear...

Life I guess is filled with "what if" questions...

I just wonder more with questions with "what if" popping up.

I just wonder ahead of time...

Sometimes we expect a situation and what if the situation does not turn out to be what we expected?

Well thats just my case...

Life's a journey,

Days ahead a mystery.

Tomorrow's challenge a tourney,

Life's end not our mastery.

Time is ticking,

It is slow.

Though start aiming,

Don't keep low.

Broken and lost,

Tears are dropping.

At the cross,

Fear not of falling.

Just some randomness today...

God bless :)

Passing of time

I guess its a fact that we really can't turn back time.

Whats done is done, whats gone is gone, whats lost is lost.

Everything does happen for a purpose but the purpose does not appear just like that...

I guess it takes time...

Whatever is coming, let it come, whatever is going, let it go.

I thank God that nothing in him is in vein.

Whatever that has happened, I'm going to leave it there only taking the experience.

Its hard to move on with live when something happens for the first time and it goes wrong...

But, the fact is accepted and I just going to move on.

Scars will be healed, wounds will be mended. How long will it take? Only time can tell and only God can do the miracle.

I'm just gonna move on and see what comes in life.

I believe in the end, He would sure provide the finest, the best, the most suitable.

God works in way we could not understand but its all not to harm us but to give the best for us.

It takes time, it takes God's work.

It will pass, it will heal, it will be mended soon.

Just be patience and let it come slowly, don't rush me.

Accept me as I'm now, you won't see an overnight change, but you will see a change to come.

Who knows? Maybe tomorrow? Maybe next week? Maybe next month? And the list goes on and on.

Sometimes ain't easy to forget, but then again, nothing is impossible :)

Anyway, I just wanna say thank you, for you've been a blessing in my life.

God bless

YES, Youth Enrichment School 2010

2 weeks at BCM has taught me a lot.

The experience there opened my eyes to a bigger world we're living in.

I started to understand, to learn many things.

God taught me many things too.

I believe that this 2 weeks weren't wasted, it was fully utilize.

I choose to join YES and I have no regrets, it was really worth it.

What I've learned?

-I learned spiritual warfare is true

-I learned to understand others more

-I learned how to talk and mix around again

-I learned certain decisions can affect friendship greatly

-I learned that its not easy to let go of things

-I learned God is working in us each day

-I learned that God is in control in everything and everything happens for a purpose

-I learned in God nothing is impossible

and the list goes on...

there are so many more...

Anyways, I just take this opportunity to say to whoever you think that this part is meant for you:

To that someone, if you are ever reading this, I just want to say I'm sorry again.

I know I was too over... I just really hope we can be like last time if its still possible...

I don't want anything else just a friendship like before.

You know who you are, and I still feel the unforgiveness in you.

Its what I felt or maybe I'm just too sensitive... cause I'm really a very sensitive person.

I just don't dare to tell you face to face so I'm writing it here, hope you don't mind.

If that someone is reading this, then thank you, cause you really taught me a lot.

I shall say I'm sorry once again... I really hope you accept my apologies.

I don't know if you'd ever read this, but I'm just going to write it.

Well, thats all for the updates

God bless :)

First Post of 2010

Happy New Year to everyone, it was a great 2009 :) but 2010 would also be awesome with new experiences.

It was awesome starting the year with God in church.

2010 is going to be a whole new year, what is coming I don't know, you don't know, only God knows.

So, 2010 is in God's hands.

Anyways this is a short wishing post.

Once again, Happy New Year =)

God bless